Two-Faced 

I just finished a book entitled “How to Solve your People Problems: Dealing with the difficult people in your life.”  It is a great book written by a Christian author (Alan Godwin) who for years has counseled people in conflict resolution, and how to deal with the difficult people in one’s life-both the “reasonable and the unreasonable.” But one thing that alarmed me as I read this book was the number of people in ministry positions, leadership positions in the church, who act one way at home and quite another way at church.  There was a true story of one man who was an elder in his church, yet for all of his married life had verbally abused his wife. He was one way at home, but quite another way in front of the flock or at a potluck meal. I find this Jekyl and Hyde facade very appalling.  Lest you think we can only READ  about such undetected atrocities inside the church, I should share a few of my own stories. I know of one church elder who each Sunday goes through the motions as a pillar in his church, speaking, sharing, serving, but on his own time, he gambles, mistreats his employees, and betrays his wife’s trust.  I know another leader in the church who verbally abuses his wife, controls her in an unhealthy and harmful way, and yet leads the “charge” each Sunday as he sets his “Sunday best” in motion. I know of women who project themselves as saints inside church circles, but they treat their adult children with such disrespect, manipulating them for their own selfish gain by employing guilt, shame, and sarcasm in order to solicit the behaviors they desire.  Essentially, these so called Christians are living a lie.   And then there is me. I serve in my church. I serve on a local chapel board. I lead bible studies.  But at home I am often disrespectful to my husband, impatient with my children, and self-righteous about  the “charges” I lead from this base of operations I call home.  I like to think that I am transparent. My motto is often “what you see is what you get.”  But sometimes I know that I am misleading others, projecting the false belief that (1 ) I have it all together or (2)  My family should be lucky to have me and/or  (3)  I am rarely, if ever wrong.  As I read Alan Godwin’s book and pondered some of these true scenarios while considering some of my own experiences with similar persons, I felt sick.  I thought to myself, “It is perhaps the worst kind of sin to act one way to the masses, while privately abusing those who are closest to you, OR anyone who takes a stand opposite your position.”  Then I started a closer examination of my own life and realized there were many areas where improvements could be made and spiritual growth could ensue.  And finely, I was left with this nagging thought.  We (Christ followers) have to look different. It is imperative that we “become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which you shine like stars in the universe as you hold out the word of life….”Philippians 2     

Jesus had much to say about the sin of “two-faced.” in Matthew 23: “Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You clean the outside of the cup and dish, but inside they are full of greed and self-indulgence. Blind Pharisee! First clean the inside of the cup and dish, and then the outside also will be clean. “Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You are like whitewashed tombs, which look beautiful on the outside but on the inside are full of dead men’s bones and everything unclean. In the same way, on the outside you appear to people as righteous but on the inside you are full of hypocrisy and wickedness. 

Paul said about himself and his missionary companions in 2 Corinthians 10 “Such people should realize that what we are in our letters when we are absent, we will be in our actions when we are present.”  Paul the apostle was the same guy in person as he was in when absent.  We should follow suit with this divine example. We should understand that if we are not for God, then we are against Him.  If we abuse others, physically, mentally or otherwise, then we are abusing the positions we hold in ministry, in our community, and in our homes.  Belonging to Christ and serving in His kingdom doesn’t grant us licenses to treat others with malice and disrespect. Leadership in ministry and “saintly” labels do NOT give us a free pass to trample down everyone in our path. Nor does it excuse us from the consequences of such behaviors.
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Freedom. Do you have it?

Recently my family and I had the privilege of traveling to Moscow, Russia for vacation.  If you know anything at all about Russian history, you might know something of its tumultuous past and volatile leadership dating back to the 14th or 15th century and well through the WWII era.  Then there was the cold war, the Soviet Union as it was, and the ensuing oppression of its people, still, after having already suffered so much loss and tragedy in the war. We had an incredible tour guide, a lovely Russian lady named Lydia who took us through both Red Square and the Kremlin sharing the minutest details of her country both past and present.  Lydia was herself a young girl during the days of the USSR regime.  She and her family grew up in a one bedroom, one bathroom flat along with 3 other families!  They would alternate the days each family used the bathroom. Still this was luxurious compared to what Lydia’s parents had endured during the war.  Lydia recalled with detail how their travel was limited if not made impossible by the government, how their thinking was distorted and manipulated by government ideology, and even their movement around their own city was hampered.  As we visited with Lydia and toured her beloved city for hours, the contrast between my upbringing and hers became undeniably obvious to me.  Later when Paul and I were alone, we marveled how “In her whole entire life, Lydia had never known freedom in the way we had.”  In her whole life, more than 60 years, and she has not tasted freedom like you and I! Needless to say, the spiritual lessons were undeniable.  Most of us have enjoyed lives free of political oppression.  Most of us.  More importantly as Christ followers we have found true freedom in Christ. Freedom from our sin, from a life in bondage to the flesh, freedom from fear.  Undiluted, glorious freedom.  Galations 5 says  It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery.  Yet how often do we allow Satan a stronghold in our lives. Guilt, shame, bitterness, anger, and/or hurt. Even our overcommitted schedules and many of our worldly pursuits hold us in captivity, and prevent us from fully embracing the abundant life with Christ.  All of these things can take root in our souls, and when they do, we are no more free than that little girl who grew up in the USSR in a one bedroom flat. Perhaps less so.  We live like captives.  But indeed Christ has set us free.  We should be singing this from the hilltops.  The thief has truly come to “steal, kill, and destroy,” but Christ has come to give us life “and to give it abundantly.”  Christians of all people should start acting like free persons. We should show the world that we are Christ followers, and our lives have been transformed by the One, the only One who gives us true freedom.

Psalm 119:45
I will walk about in freedom, for I have sought out your precepts.

Luke 4:18 The Spirit of the Lord is on me, because he has anointed me to preach good news to the poor. He has sent me to proclaim freedom for the prisoners and recovery of sight for the blind, to release the oppressed.

Romans 8:20-21 For the creation was subjected to frustration, not by its own choice, but by the will of the one who subjected it, in hope that the creation itself will be liberated from its bondage to decay and brought into the glorious freedom of the children of God.

2 Cor. 3:17 Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom.

Ephesians 3:12 In him and through faith in him we may approach God with freedom and confidence.