Category Archives: Parenting

D-Day + 70 years. What you don’t know could hurt you.

"Will you tell me how we did this?"  Col James Earl Rudder, June 6, 1954, 10 year anniversary of D-DAY  Point Du Hoc, Normandy France
“Will you tell me how we did this?” Col James Earl Rudder, June 6, 1954, 10 year anniversary of D-DAY
Point Du Hoc, Normandy France
“Rangers, Lead The Way!” ~ Colonel Francis W. Dawson Point Du Hoc (at the top of the cliff) Normandy, France
“Rangers, Lead The Way!” ~ Colonel Francis W. Dawson
Point Du Hoc (at the top of the cliff) Normandy, France
Visiting a very peaceful Omaha Beach in the Spring of 2011
Visiting a very peaceful Omaha Beach in the Spring of 2011
Overlooking Omaha Beach, the launching point of the U.S. invasion of Normandy American Cemetery at Colleville
Overlooking Omaha Beach, the launching point of the U.S. invasion of Normandy
American Cemetery at Colleville

Here we are 70 years later. It has been a mere 70 years since allied troops landed on the beaches of Normandy to keep the free world free. “On June 6, 1944, more than 160,000 Allied troops landed along a 50-mile stretch of heavily fortified French coastline, to fight Nazi Germany on the beaches of Normandy, France. Gen. Dwight D. Eisenhower called the operation a crusade in which, ‘we will accept nothing less than full victory.’ More than 5,000 Ships and 13,000 aircraft supported the D-Day invasion, and by day’s end, the Allies gained a foot-hold in Continental Europe. The cost in lives on D-Day was high. More than 9,000 Allied Soldiers were killed or wounded, but their sacrifice allowed more than 100,000 Soldiers to begin the slow, hard slog across Europe, to defeat Adolph Hitler’s crack troops.” (Army.Mil) Five French beaches were taken by the allies: Juno, Gold, Sword, Omaha, and Utah. So why DO I care? Why should any of us care? Most often, there is an assumption that I care because my husband spent 23 years in the United States Air Force. Or others think, “Oh sure you care and know a lot about D-Day because you are veteran of Desert Storm. You care because you have been connected to the military most of your adult years.” But that is simply not true. Yes, I care about D-Day for all of those reasons, but if those reasons did not exist, would I still be teaching my children the facts about D-Day, Pearl Harbor, Battle of the Bulge, Gettysburg, Valley Forge? Even if it were true that our income were not dependent upon the military for the last 23 years, and even if it were true that their dad had a 9-5 job that found him home most evenings and weekends, would I still be teaching them the importance of D-Day? Would I recognize the impact it has made on their lives, as they unwittingly enjoy all the privileges that are afforded them-which has been at the expense of literally thousands upon thousands of American lives? If for any reason, I would choose not to teach my kids the facts of D-Day, the importance of that day which truly will always live in infamy, then God help me. I recently started substitute teaching in the schools. Every day we stand and say the pledge of allegiance to the American flag in our schools. It always tugs at my heart a little when kids either do not stand, or do not place their hands over their hearts. Why should they? If they know absolutely nothing-not a single fact behind the reason for the flag and what it represents, why would they show respect to this very special symbol that represents their own history. And what they don’t know could hurt them. What we don’t know can contribute to a life that revolves around me! Not a life that revolves around serving others. If I know what happened on those beaches 70 years ago, and truly understand the losses that took place there, the profound stories of survival and death, it’s hard to remain smug and pious about my material wealth, my freedom, my time, money, and everything that I own! The more I know, the better off I am, and the better off are those around me, those I influence every single day of my life, both personally and professionally. This is something I know: On Omaha beach alone, there were over 2500 casualties on D-Day. The 116th regiment belonging to the 29th Infantry Division was believed to have lost over 75% of their entire regiment. That is a staggering statistic. In his book “D-Day,” Stephen Ambrose calls this chapter, “Visitors to Hell.” The 116th was in the first wave onto Omaha Beach, which later became known as “Bloody Omaha,” due to the horrific fighting and loss of lives on both sides that took place that day. I know the importance of that day simply because I read and study about it. And I read and study about it because I care about the sacrifices these men and women and their families have made literally so I can come and go as I choose. I care about those sacrifices in much the same way that I care about the sacrifices my husband makes for my family and I every day. It doesn’t take enlistment in a military career, a military paycheck or any other form of military service in order for us to care about this incredible event. It just takes common sense. It takes gratitude for everything you have. Here we are 70 years later. What have we learned? More importantly, what have I learned? Some might say, “The last thing I need is another history lesson.” But 70 years later, that is exactly what we need. D-Day was a pivotal battle(s). It was a turning point in WWII that eventually led to victory in Europe, and peace once again in places where people truly believed there may never be peace again. I hope that this year, on this 70th anniversary of D-Day, you will take a little time, just a few minutes to read about one hero from that day. There were thousands. Just pick one. Share the story of your hero with your kids and your family. And then just be thankful.

What breaks your heart?

Shelby

We have lots and lots of beggars, if you will, who frequent the main intersections along the highway frontage road near our house. Usually I try to keep a few bucks handy, and if traffic lights and timing allow, I’ll hand it out the window, as I pass by, to the waiting hand on the other side. One day my daughter Shelby and I were sitting at the red light when I said out loud, mostly to myself, “I have no money on me.” I glanced over at Shelby (then 16 years old) who without saying a word, was quietly rummaging through her own wallet, and promptly withdrew $5 of her meager babysitting earnings. I told her that she didn’t have to give that much, but she shrugged her shoulders and gladly passed it over to me. I think her heart was breaking for that guy who asked for money. And if mine wasn’t before we stopped at the traffic light, it certainly was now. Shelby’s generosity and compassion did not require an application, a questionnaire or any prior knowledge of that man’s life situation. Her heart took over, and she acted on it. That’s what a broken heart does. It acts. Maybe that doesn’t always happen by giving money. It could be time, food, talents, coffee, smiles, hugs, or just your availability. But I hope first of all that your heart breaks for something, for someone! And second of all, I hope when it does, you act on it. Sometimes my heart breaks for a friend who is going through a tough time with their child (lots of empathy going on here) and I am compelled to send them a note of encouragement, reminding than that God is their provider and their safety net. Sometimes my heart breaks for teenagers (a lot of the time) who seem to be bent on a path of destruction and often seem to think that a relationship with a boyfriend or a girlfriend is going to solve all of their problems, when really what they crave is a relationship with a parent who takes the time to help them navigate these impressionable years with love and accountability. Sometimes I just look into the faces of students when I am substitute teaching in school or when teaching a college class, and my heart breaks for all the stories in that room to which I am not privy. Sometimes the only way I can “act” on that heartbreak is to treat them with respect and offer them a reassuring smile. Sometimes my heart breaks when I see that same woman at that same intersection with that same sign asking for help. She’s about my age. But she’s much taller. Her hair always seems dirty, and her face always seems to be lined with worry. That face stays with me in my mind’s eye long after I pass by. My heart breaks when I read about young girls abducted into sexual slavery, taken By force from their homes and their mothers. My heart breaks when I visit the nursing home on a local mission with my church, and elderly faces stare up at you with gratitude for taking only 3 hours out of an entire month to listen to their stories. Incredible stories of loss, love, joy, war, heroism, and hard work! Yet they are grateful to me-for what? For taking 2 or 3 measly hours away from the hustle and bustle of my comfy life to visit with them. My heart breaks. If your heart never breaks, you should ask yourself one simple question. “Why not?” Not always, but sometimes this invincible heart is facilitated by one or two overriding factors. The first is “I’m too busy with my own life, to have a broken heart over someone else’s!” And secondly, we pass judgement quickly, and abruptly then bypass our hearts all together. We often act as judge and jury over someone’s life even when we often know very little about them. But when we do, the judgement is pronounced and no mercy is forth given. Common statements to this effect might include, “He asked for that!” “She had it coming!” Regardless of the reason, when our heart fails to break, we fail to act. And regardless of the reasons-in that moment-no one-not anybody is more undeserving than we are of a hot meal, a warm bed, fresh water, protection, a listening ear, hope, inspiration, or help. Being a good steward of our money and our time, while having compassion and generosity for others can indeed coexist. We build big beautiful houses, and then use them only for ourselves. We drive cars that cost as much as a small house, and yet are unwilling to part with either our money OR our time for those less fortunate. Well, perhaps-unless we know a LOT about them and their life situation! There’s more than enough hurt in this world to go around. There is no shortage of opportunities to lend a hand or a dollar. The only way I know how to deal with a broken heart is to help mend someone else’s. Try emptying your mind of all of your preconceived notions about who is and who is not deserving. Free yourself of the self-imposed restrictions hindering you from meeting someone’s need. The end result could be life changing for someone, maybe even you.